11 juillet 2005

The building that wouldn't just die - episode 165,731

This is going to be one mother of a day.
This morning, two of my neighbours are coming with a plumber to investigate the leak that has been ruining my bathroom ceiling for 8 months now. Good things come to those who wait, eh. Then, we'll all go look knowingly at the wall that's been incriminated in the humidity that a few people have been complaining about for, what, 8 months, maybe? Then in the evening, we are - or we are not, it has not been confirmed yet, and I'm betting on a last-minute cancellation - meeting with the managing agent, in preparation for the meeting that we'll be having next week (yeah, whatever). Although even if the managing agent does not grace us with her presence, we'll still be convening among ourselves, to discuss a few points. Ooh the fun.
That means two things.
One, that I'll be spending way too much time with my upstairs neighbour, who is a sweet girl, I'm sure, but displays unfortunate furniture-shuffling habits and evidently suffers from an acute elocution problem. Either she loves the sound of her voice, or she has a very very bad case of aphasia. It takes her forever to make a sentence, and I'm not exaggerating, because she's constantly looking for words, going errrrrrrrrrrr, and emmmmmm and - argh! it drives my blood pressure to yet unwitnessed levels.
On Friday, I lost 15 minutes of my life - which she is not giving back to me - when she phoned to ask me to phone the managing agent (yes, the logic of that eluded me as well) because she wanted to make sure that the works planned on the outside wall did concern the whole of the wall, and not just a part of it that wouldn't solve any of her problem. Except she took 15 minutes to say that, and when, at the end of the phone call, I said "So I'm checking with the woman that the whole wall will be fixed", she went "Eeeexactly, eeeeexactly. You errrrrrrr summed up my point emmmmmm precisely. That's eeeeeexactly what I errrrrrrrr meant." And she went on again.
I did try to phone the managing agent on Friday afternoon, right after my neighbour had phoned me, but obviously couldn't get through. I tried again this morning, and was told she'd call me back. Needless to say, I'm still waiting. And then my neighbour phoned me again, and sounded surprised when I said I'd tried to call the agency. Turns out she had as well. AH AH fucking AH.
That's it for thing one.
Thing second is this, and it derives straight from thing one. There is a risk that I might be arrested by the police before the night is through. If I have to spend a whole day and a whole evening (which, again, I'm not getting back) with my neighbour, and see the managing agent, and deal with angry flat-owners who are going to have to pay through the nose for all that there is to do in the building, well surely someone is going to have to die. And seeing as I'm not married, haven't yet found the job I want, and am still intent on changing countries, it's only fair to assume that, the best being ahead of me, it won't be me.
I intend to plead temporary insanity.